


falling asleep in your arms; oh no!

by avacado_27



Category: Dangan Ronpa - All Media Types, Super Dangan Ronpa 2
Genre: Angst, Hurt/Comfort, I'm Bad At Tagging, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-03-06
Updated: 2021-03-06
Packaged: 2021-03-12 12:01:49
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,871
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29884278
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/avacado_27/pseuds/avacado_27
Summary: the reasons he came out always varied. most of the time it was a nightmare of some sort. he supposed it was natural, considering the horrific situation they were all in.sometimes it wasn't even a nightmare. sometimes it was a memory.(in which hajime just wants a hug, but knows he doesn't deserve one.)
Relationships: Hinata Hajime/Komaeda Nagito
Comments: 6
Kudos: 48





	falling asleep in your arms; oh no!

**Author's Note:**

> jdjshd hello!! I'd like to preface this by saying this work has mentions of suicidal ideation and is in general a vent fic, so if that has a chance of potentially triggering/harming you please don't read!! I could care less if you read my random angsty fic, but I do care very much that you take care of yourself. if you wanna talk, see a professional if you can, or talk to me!! I'd be happy to let you vent.
> 
> with that out of the way here is badly written angsty hajime :) (also send help I cannot title fics)

the air was biting and cold. he couldn't care less, letting the sharp sting of salt burn his nose. he came out here to think whenever he couldn't sleep.

_recently, he'd been coming more often._

he dug his fingers into the sand. he'd never liked beaches, with the way grains of sand would dig themselves into your nails and every crevice of your body, regardless of anything you did.

_he'd always hated it, and yet now he found it a welcome distraction._

the reasons he came out always varied. most of the time it was a nightmare of some sort. he supposed it was natural, considering the horrific situation they were all in.

_sometimes it wasn't even a nightmare. sometimes it was a memory._

during the day, the ocean seemed much calmer. the sunlight would shimmer across the clear, bright blue surface, and for a second he could pretend he was actually on a school field trip to these beautiful deserted islands.

_during the night it was black and stormy, threatening to eat him up whole._

he curled into himself, trying to stop thinking for just one night. it never worked, and honestly kind of just made it worse. he didn't care. he just wanted to leave this place.

_which place? the island, his mind? he couldn't tell the difference._

he heard footsteps behind him. they were light, almost silent. maybe he should've been afraid someone had come to kill him, but at this point he couldn't care less.

_was he suicidal? he didn't think he was. maybe he was wrong._

the soft crunching of sand beneath feet continued until it stopped, right next to him. he didn't care to look up to see who it was. there weren't many of them left, anyways.

_so many of them gone, right before his eyes. killed, and he was powerless to stop it._

the person next to him (whoever it was) slowly sat next to him. part of him was curious as to why they were up, too, but he didn't say anything. it wasn't in his place to, he supposed.

_they all had problems too. he knew that. he was painfully aware._

"kinda cold, huh?" he could recognize the voice. he'd heard it so many times in so many contexts-- but here it took on an awfully soft tone, one that helped him forget that the person next to him was most certainly not sane.

_at this point, he probably wasn't, either._

he only nodded. he felt too exhausted, so utterly drained that he couldn't even answer a simple yes or no. the person (boy) next to him hummed. they (he) didn't say anything about the lack of answer. 

_he was sick of silence._

he heard shifting next to him. he still didn't look up until he felt a weight on his shoulder. when he looked over, he saw a mess of white and a pale, tired face. he wondered if he looked that way too.

_he never looked in mirrors anymore. he couldn't._

"so, why're you up?" 

_he didn't know anymore._

"couldn't sleep."

_that was only part of it._

"hmm. same here, i suppose."

he didn't say anything after that. he just followed the rhythmic push and pull of the waves with his eyes and let himself space out again. he could feel the soft breathing of the boy resting on his shoulder.

_he wasn't used to touching people. it unnerved him._

he jolted the slightest bit when he felt a small finger begin to trace circles into his arm. it was clearly absent minded, considering how light the touch was. it almost seemed like he was scared to press too hard.

_his constant self deprecating comments did get annoying, but he wished nagito would realize nobody hates him as much as he seems to believe._

"is it okay if i stay here too?" he nodded. he'd never admit it, but he did get lonely most nights, sinking in his own restless thoughts. he wondered if that was why the other was out too, if he too had horrific thoughts plague him. he wouldn't put it past the lucky student.

the other seemed to relax onto his shoulder at that. he was glad. he may not be a big fan of the boy and his warped perception of 'hope', but he'd always felt a strange interest in him. he wanted to know more about him, and (as much as he hated to admit it), he cared enough to want him to be comfortable.

eventually the hand that had been tracing shapes into his arm came to rest on his hand. if it had been any other time, maybe he would've blushed. pulled his hand away, stuttering, as the other giggled.

but it wasn't, so instead he let the cold hand lay on his own in the sand. he let his head tilt until it lay on nagito's, and closed his eyes. he could hear the gentle echo of waves lapping against the shore as he sighed.

"hinata-kun?" he hummed. "do you want to talk to me about it? or i could go ask someone else to do so, i understand if you don't want to talk to trash like me-"

he cut him off with a gentle squeeze to his hand. "no, it's fine." he didn't say anything more. he wanted to, sure, but half of him insisted nagito was dangerous, and the other insisted that he shouldn't show weakness. 

_were either of them really wrong?_

he could feel nagito grin, and lift his head from his shoulder. he already missed the warmth. he kept his hand on his, though. 

"if scum like me could help an ultimate like you, i'd do anything." nagito spoke. he'd said the same words so many times, but for once they were actually comforting and not just the crazed words of a deranged lunatic.

he simply hummed in response. he wasn't sure what to say. in all honesty, he couldn't remember why he was here today. it all blended together until the only thing he knew for certain was he couldn't sleep.

"if you'd like, i can tell you why i'm out here first. unless you don't want to hear it, which is understandable." 

he just nodded. "go ahead."

"well, first, i noticed you leaving your cottage. i can tell you haven't been sleeping well, so i was worried." of course he'd noticed. "but i didn't want to intrude-- you see i try to keep out of the ultimates' way unless i can help, which is rarely."

he just nodded. he supposed nagito likely bottled up his feelings a lot, seeing as he had such an intense inferiority complex- he probably needed a chance to vent.

_did he really deserve that chance, though?_

"but then i started to get restless, and started reading into it. i thought you might be trying to kill someone, or something. i wanted to help you, is all."

he snorted. "well, i wasn't."

"i can see that. now, will you tell me what you actually were doing?"

he inhaled. "would you believe me if i said i don't remember?" 

"you don't seem to remember a lot of things." he nodded. "do you come out here often?" he nodded again.

"i don't think i ever had problems sleeping before. but i've… been having nightmares, i guess." 

"ah. i think a lot of us have."

he looked over. "have you?"

nagito smiled. it seemed it was meant to be the psychotic look he took when he went on his monologs about hope, but he could see the tinge of sadness in it. "sure have."

he just nodded. he didn't know what to say, really. he rarely talked about emotions, let alone with someone like nagito. 

he blinked slowly. the night sky was hazy and vast, stars twinkling. he looked up and sighed. "the stars are so clear here."

"mhm."

they sat in silence for a while, basking in the calm serenity of the beach. he brought his gaze to nagito, who had his eyes softly shut. the moonlight reflected quite beautifully across his near white hair, he thought.

a lot of his nightmares seemed to include nagito. they ranged from the white haired boy losing what little sanity he had left and killing all his friends, to him trying to take his own life. he didn't like the latter. 

_sometimes he thought he should like them. nagito was a liar, a bad person, he deserved to die--_

he let out a huff of air, tired of his mind's constant conflict. he kept telling himself that nagito was dangerous and clearly untrustworthy, yet something always drew him back to the strange boy.

_maybe he really was a masochist._

"hinata-kun," nagito began after a moment of thought. "if you would like, you can tell me what they were about. i've heard it helps. maybe that wouldn't be true if it were me, but if i can, i'd be honored to help in any way you wish."

hajime lifted his eyes back to the sea. "i'm not really in the mood to talk about it. maybe later."

_hopefully never, the others don't deserve to deal with your crap- not even nagito. you're just making your problems seem worse than they are. selfish. awful._

“okay.” the endless silence once again blanketed over them, washing away any words and thoughts they had.

_komaeda knew. komaeda had it worse, komaeda understood how he felt._

he hardly even noticed when tears began trickling down his face.

they were small, hardly there. he could feel himself begin to shake slightly, the weight of their situation falling on him.

_he was probably going to die. everyone he knew- chiaki, kazuichi, komaeda- they were all probably going to die._

of course, he already _knew_ that- they were in a killing game, obviously people were going to die- but for some _stupid_ reason-

_it just hit him._

“hinata-kun?” komaeda shifted to look up at him. “you're shaking.”

"o-oh. i didn't even notice, haha…" noticing the slight concern in the other's eyes, he added: "i'm probably just cold."

ashy green eyes held his gaze for another moment before relenting and turning back to the endless sea once more. "kinda funny it how cold it gets on a tropical island."

"well, it is, like, midnight. even hot deserts get super cold at this time of night…"

a quiet hum of agreement came from the head laying on his shoulder.

_komaeda must be uncomfortable, his neck must be aching, stop being so selfish and just leave already--_

hajime loosely let his arm wrap around komaeda, not really putting any pressure onto the warm body next to him, but pulling it closer regardless. the white haired boy seemed to recognize the want for closeness and laid his own arm over the other.

maybe hajime wasn't quite ready to talk about his feelings. maybe hinata was too hopeless to actually find a way off this island.

but nagito's embrace was pretty comforting and warm.

_maybe he could stay like this just a little longer._

(later, they woke up like that; hinata a blushing, embarrassed mess, and nagito laughing airily as the two took in the quiet, warm morning.)

**Author's Note:**

> tysm for reading!! I'm still not very good at writing but,,, here we are 
> 
> if I made any spelling/grammar mistakes or if there are any continuity errors, please let me know! I tried to proofread but I probably missed a bunch djjdhfn
> 
> and yes I am very touched starved-- it was bad enough before quarantine but now I'm just fjjshcbdbak


End file.
